It’ll come as little surprise to most that Matt did a post a while back about a game called Muscle March which involved, as his title suggested, men in pants. If you saw the video of muscular gentlemen running through walls and thought ‘I’d very much like a piece of that’ and you live in the USA, then you may well be in luck.

The ESRB (software ratings board for America) have classified the game and given it an Everyone 10+ rating, so go ahead and buy it for your kids. In addition to this, they have gone into great detail to describe just what the game is about. It reads a lot like homo-erotic porn. Enjoy.

Bodybuilders dressed in super-tight Speedos chase down a “protein thief” through cities, villages, and space in this whimsical puzzle-action game. Pedestrians, straphangers, school teachers, farmers, police officers, and librarians are fully clothed as they go about their business; the bodybuilders—not so much. Players must perform correct poses to fit through dozens of holes-in-walls created by the fleeing thief. If players do not pose correctly while running, their muscle men (and one woman) will crash through the walls and lose their stamina. Losing stamina means collapsing to the ground face-first, buttocks-last (flexed gluteus facing the screen). It may also mean that between stages, the happy bodybuilders can dance together in space, throw rocks by the riverside, or flex their pectorales major on menu screens (the lone female bodybuilder flexes her chest muscles, too). But the running gag in the game is the odd juxtaposition of traipsing bodybuilders, scantily clad, with the fully clothed working city dwellers—librarians’ eyes agape at seeing their reference sections destroyed by the Posing Ones.

I’m not entirely sure what a ‘protein thief’ is, but I’m pretty certain I wouldn’t go chasing one. By the way, it also mentions a female bodybuilder in there, so it’s probably okay if you felt aroused whilst reading that.